1. No one cares what you got on the SAT
Oh, you got a 2400? Congratulations, I got a 2000 but look at us both here at Yale. Guess your score didn’t really matter. So stop bringing it up.
2. Your Durfee’s swipe will save your life
Forget going to a dining hall for lunch, because that $8 at Durfee’s will change your life. Sure, a package of Oreo’s shouldn’t cost you $5.25, but when you want to eat only Oreo’s for lunch, it doesn’t really matter now, does it?
3. Freshman Holiday Dinner is Magical
There is never a better time to question whether or not you actually attend Hogwarts as during the Freshman Holiday Dinner, when you feast on enough sushi and Cornish hens to feed a moderately sized village, and people run away with huge gingerbread houses and ice sculptures.
4. Master’s Teas are Your Chance to Hob-Knob
Every residential college master will host an array of guests for teas in their house throughout the semester. Guests range from visiting fellows to authors to former CEOs of Chanel, and you get a chance to talk with them in an intimate setting. Plus, there’s all the tea and finger sandwiches your heart desires. Often, your master will also sponsor dinners afterwards with the speaker, and you’ll get dinner for free at a local restaurant (Free Hibachi, anyone?).
5. The Office of Career Strategy can save your butt
Sure, it may seem far away, being on Whitney Avenue, bit magic happens in that building. Career strategy staff will do everything for you from helping you craft a perfect resume and cover letter, to searching for internships and jobs after graduation, to simply talking you down off a cliff. They are a resource you need to utilize. Plus, you burn at least a hundred calories walking there and back.
6. You must hate Harvard.
Even if you are from Boston originally, this is not a suggestion. This is a rule. You will dye your blood Yale blue and never look back. There is no bigger event than the Yale-Harvard football game, but every single time we go against Harvard in any event, it is war. Even if that was your second choice school, or maybe your first, the second you become a Bulldog, you must despise everything Harvard. It’s the rule of the road. Don’t forget it.
7. New Haven is not nearly as dangerous as you think
New Haven is no hub of metropolitan murder or robbery. Like any other city, it has crime, but the presence of Yale creates a protective little bubble around all students. There are Blue phones, which are constantly lit up and can connect you to police and security personnel, everywhere you look on campus. To get into most areas of campus, you have to swipe in with your ID so you don’t have to worry about some random stranger showing up in your hallway. Yale security officers are always around and willing to help. It’s not a haven for crime, but you still should be smart and not walk around at midnight displaying all your earthly possessions.
8. The Theater Scene is AMAZING!
If you enjoy theater, Yale is the place for you. Whether you love to be a patron, be on the stage, direct or do sound design, the Yale theater scene has a place for you. Every semester there are dozens of productions, many of them student written originals. Plus, Meryl Streep and Lupita Nyong’o are Yale theater graduates, so we clearly know what we are doing.
9. The Harkness Tower will play your favorite tunes
The Caroliners are known for playing everything from One Direction to Broadway showtunes to Katy Perry’s Firework. They have been known to be very sass and play Let It Go during snowstorms though. If you have any musical talent, look into learning to play the bells, because then you can make the entire campus listen to whatever you feel like playing. The Game of Thrones theme song really sets the mood for dinner, don’t you think?
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